Ladots on the Map…Navagating Life’s Road

I’ve genuinely been struggling with a title for this blog for weeks. First of all, why in the name of sweet baby Jesus do I want to write a blog? Perhaps, I feel I have something to say, and I think people want to hear it, or maybe I’m using this as a therapy tool to continue my journey to self-awareness and improvement.

So a little background about the name, first the “Life’s Road” portion.

Flashback to San Antonio, and the news of Orders to Friggin Minot North Dakota.  (Often ‘North Dakota’ is preceded with Friggin or another more colorful word)   The conversation went like this, me “so you’re saying we have to choose between Grand Forks North Dakota, Minot North Dakota, Elsworth Sout Dakota and Malmstrom, Montana….who did you piss off?? ” Well…we determined we didn’t want to go to South Dakota, or Montana (which in Hindsight was a dumbass move, I would LOVE to live in Montana)…we chose to not go to Grand Forks because it had recently flooded, so we Chose Charming MINOT. “Why Not Minot…Freezin’s the Reason”.  Ironically Minot flooded, the year after we got there.

I had no idea what I was going to do up there; I was a Teacher at a discipline school in Texas.  My certification was 6-12 Business Education. So I started looking for teaching jobs. There weren’t any in Minot except for one place. It was called “The Boys and Girls Ranch” it was right up my alley, it was a placement facility for troubled teens. I spoke with the school; they were excited about the thought of having a business teacher at the campus. We were thrilled to move forward with the hiring process. Then I got the phone call; you know the one where the ringing sounds like a dying payphone. Nicole, there is no reciprocity for your teaching certification in North Dakota.

My dream of teaching in North Dakota was shattered, so I had to, once again, in the many duty stations of my life, figure out who I was going to be. I’ve always had an affinity for Photography. I think I can thank my Uncle Nick for that. I admire photographers and always admired those who could capture such amazing images. One day, while driving around the flatlands of North Dakota, I was heading out the road to Lake Darling. It was a long straight road, and I was compelled to stop and kneel in the middle of the way to capture the image. Sure enough, Life’s Road Photography was born in that instance. I know there are multiple ‘Life’s Road Photography’ businesses out there, I’ve honestly been too lazy to look officially, but for me, the name stuck because my entire adult life has been about the road ahead of me.

Life’s Road was my attempt to put a name on my futile photography efforts. I’ve captured some amazing things over the years, and I love to see what I caught printed and hung on a wall. Life’s Road hasn’t been an easy one for me, but when I thought about writing this blog, I knew the name had to be a bit different.

Back from the brief commercial break…I am in the process of getting divorced…for the second time.  EX2 has moved home (back to North Dakota) and we filed for divorce, but in the lovely state of Pennsylvania we now have a 90 day “cool off” period, which had I known there was a “cool off” period, I would’ve filed when he left in May.

So, I wait, I wait for the official piece of paper to tell me that my marital assets are divided, and he no longer has to be listed as my beneficiary on my 401k.

The big question is why am I changing my last name back to my maiden name.  Well, it has always been the name I’ve loved most.  Most people can’t spell it or pronounce it.  I was often referred to as “Dot” in High school by upperclassmen who knew my cousin. Hence Ladots.

Ladots on the map, if I stopped and pictured where I’ve been on an actual map, I’ve been everywhere. I moved away at 19 years old to live overseas. I circled back from the rainiest place on earth to the desert and everywhere in between.

On that journey though, I have a few flags of life-changing events that marked the town as a forever memory. Some of my flags include My first “BIG” speeding ticket in a podunk Texas town. The birth of my son in a British Hospital, the lateness of my daughter’s arrival in a Phoenix hospital room that was the size of a closet. The day I broke down at 4 am in the middle of Texas and couldn’t’ change my tire because I had a shoulder injury but was rescued by two gigantic farmers from North Dakota. The day I realized I wasn’t in love with my husband, followed years later with the day I realized I made a mistake divorcing EX1. The painful days I say goodbye to my children because Ex1 has custody of my two younger children and we live states apart. Businesses I’ve owned, Friends I’ve lost, the Journey to self-discovery and the Vacation that introduced me to Online dating.  I can’t wait to share the pure entertainment that has provided. All of these things have affected my life, they’ve been flags on my journey, and here I am now excited about a future that is bright and full of wonder.

This blog is my story and my journey, and I hope it brings you some hope, a few laughs and makes you think about the dots on your map and how you’ve managed to navigate your Life Road.